i'd say...

things best not to do while trying to study for history of modern archi paper that you know you're rather screwed for:
1. start big bang theory
2. skype friends in ny knowing you could have likewise gone to toronto
3. hence be left distracted
4. rendering you unable to comprehend Megastructures and Le Corbu in the slightest

good bloody job

 I reckon the past 7 weeks of studio wok has corroded my brain. Can't seem to sit still and finish this essay. Plus all that drawing and model making has left my hands itching to do work. which is never a good combination (dead brain/itchy fingers) because i just end up doing other nonsense things (such as updating lj. my journal really sld be buried 6 feet under by now) on the computer simply for the sake of typing/ clicking (since i'm not getting much of that done with my essay).

but ok i will finish this damn essay tonight so that i can start on my drawings tonight. while watching gran torino!! (: New workshop beckons next week. am scared as hell of having Fong as a tutor but mmmm, I can learn alot from him. I can't wait for this semester to be over (yes, holidays of cos) cos i really want to get a grade. I need to know how i'm doing. there is apparently a summer internship in ny/boston next year but i doubt it's open to year 1s. but these are the kind of things that get me excited and i realise that i need to really be performing well in order to do sort of things. I'm really afraid of being just mediocre... anyway, NEW WORKSHOP. new start, excitingg... architecture is proving to be everything i expected and more, whether that's a good thing or not, i'm sticking to it for now. 

 eee. my head feels like a desert. really hot and really dry. wringing it but not a drop of design juice is coming out :( i think i can only come out with so many new ideas (one after another) and on so many hours of sleep too. going to sleep! and hopefully my subconscious will help me out this once! please please please let tmr be a productive day! 

 in school, hardly slept last night again. got home at 6am and found myself locked out cos being a dumbass, i forgot to bring my key. coffee should kick in anytime soon... and just found out we're gonna yet another new assignment later today- we seriously don't get a fcking break. not one. but ok last week before recess week. totally neglecting all my other modules but nvm. LETZZZ GO! 

- research maki (fri, due wed)
- confirm 2 designers and hypo (sun, email tessa)
- learn how to do perspective drawing
- buy scale ruler
- bring extension cord

one week left in Montreal!

So Toronto and Niagara was good! i really like Toronto. It's like a wanna-be NYC but less intense and safer- cos i'm that kinda gurllll. visiting UofT was pretty heart-breaking. and i realised that i should have deferred my acceptance there just in case i hate NUS and want to transfer or something. stupid stupid. 

( black or white )
dreading the flight back already though. it's insanely long. plus 12 hour transit in paris. which i have to figure out what to do when there.

k sleeppp

I just got back from supper at some pizza place in town and it was very very good. and sinful. But it's ok cos i gymed today. They was however this very odd angmoh man who kept bursting into song. I'm not kidding, he'd have his ipod shoved up in his ears while on the crosstrainer and at any instance, he just shouts parts of the song to the rest of the gym. Everyone was just exchanging puzzled glances and was like "okkk, glad those endorphins are working for ya buddy..."

Anyway, just had supper with Kel and J and the food/drinks were very good and so was the girl talk. We're all growing up so fast... hahaha. but seriously, i can't wait to stay working and earning my own money to do as i please. (I also really can't wait till either J or I get our driving license so we can do this more often.) But i'm afraid that I'll hate working... things i make out to be great never turn out great.

( prep )
OH YES!! lj has stopped sending me email notifications. It's really quite annoying! does anyone know why? Is it lj or hotmail or just me? cos technology does seem to hate me. really, my phone, digital camera and laptop... it's like a frickin coup.

* OH and i just watched the last 2 eps of greys! WOW DRAMA/ SHOCK/ EXCITINGZZ. I'm so glad the show isn't getting lamer.

today i:
1. love driving even though i stalled on the main road twice and almost once in front of a police car
2. got into archi. uh-oh
3. am officially sick-sick.
4. watched I Am Legend and thought it was awesome, Will Smith was awesome and Sam the German Shepherd was awesome(st!).
5. bought another dress online even though i promised myself i wouldn't and just really really shouldn't.

ehh i'm just sitting in my room secretly bunched up in a sweater and nursing a good hot cup of green tea because i think i'm falling sick. and i just had a bowl of green bean soup (eckk) because anything mucky and green like that looks healthy and cooling. i'm trying to self medicate cos i don't want my mum to find out i'm falling sick. because she's so paranoid she'll think i have swine flu/ weak and prone to illnesses and will NEVER let me go on my holiday EVER.

and it's Mothers' Day tmr and i still haven't finished the portrait. and I'm really in no mood to do so right now... and I have one million meetings tmr so I won't get it done tmr either....

AND still waiting on nus archi... please hurry up. I got into UofT for archi but i don't think i got any entrance scholarships. Everything sort of just points to me staying. i) no from UCL, hence ii) didn't bother with designspore scholarship apps, iii) no entrance scholarship from UofT. God really seems to be closing doors but I just seem to be keen on jamming my foot in this one. such a stubborn silly girl.

hee hee. driving's awesomely fun, yes, awesomely. There's something rather empowering about being in control of this big piece of equipment rickety old manual Toyota. can't wait for my next lesson.

So, i think my mum's serious about wanting me to hang out with my brother's currently-med/ future-doctor friends. (as a deterrent against meeting archi boys who will be overworked and unpaid) So anw, i met this guy today who's in 4th year med and plans to be a surgeon. But thats besides the point. He's really quite a nice boy and i just realised how ungentlemanly and stupid most of my guy friends are. But I love them anyways because they make me LOL ( i don't use "lol"). But I think it must be ridiculously hard to find a guy who's smart, nice and know how not to take himself too seriously.

and since love is in the air (not mine fer'sure!) and wedding bells are ringing, i just managed to make 2 of my brothers promise that should their fiances refuse to let me be their bridesmaid, I'll be made bestman :D heehee I can't wait to wear a suit! I'll try my best to look smashing.

BLOODY HELLLL! i just need someone to talk some sense into my parents who just told me they intend to cancel my ENTIRE summer trip. it's not like i'm going to mexico! omg i should have just gone in aprillll! no way no way no frickin way. i've waited way too long for this. i even gave up an internship because i knew i wouldn't be around in june/july! :((((  just informed my brother to call tmr to knock some sense into my parents. SOS KOR SOS! omg i'm just gonna hope and pray that it gets better by june. i feel slightly horrible that i'm so upset because the flu threatens my trip and not because so many people have died or fallen really ill. of cos i feel bad but it's just that before uni starts (and i'm most likely stuck here), i want to at least have an awesome time over there. FINGERS-CROSSED.

 HALT SWINE FLU!!! HALTTTTT! my mum just told me that i shouldn't visit nyc because the virus is spreading there. nonononononono!  i'm so afraid that my whole summer trip is going to be canceled now!  only see the flu getting worse :(((

anyway, i've decided to take up kickboxing! i'm trying to convince my mum i can take care of myself and not get kidnapped/raped/murdered/all of the above by random men. so anw, i was googling kickboxing and i found so many classes though most of them are aerobic/dance kinds. i did find one rather intense muay thai one though!

here are some learning outcomes listed:
*Basic strikes for self defense
*Escapes from Grabs, Holds, Bear Hugs, Chokes common street attacks.
*Psychology of Street Self Defense, Awareness, How to Avoid Violence
*Basic ground fighting and escapes
* Defense against knife, baton/baseball bat and gun threat/attacks.

HAHAHA SOUNDS PERFECT!!!
...but apparently it's in thailand... so nvm.

* oh yeah archi interview schedule realised and i'm not on it!!!  but "Please note that NOT ALL candidates are required to attend the interview. Candidates may be admitted to the course without having to attend the interview. You will be informed of the admission results in writing by Office of Admission" greattt. oh well, either way, one less interview so who's complaining! :D

i gymed today so hurray! i've been putting off the gym for such a long time! this is so big for me, it really does deserve a post of it's own.

eh, think i'll swim tmr though, my butt and thighs are aching like hell....

p.s. i miss you house! be nice to the new tenants. i'm sorry they put such fugly emerald glossy green curtains on you. and the offensive plastic fake-wood tiles they put in place of the carpets. i could go on but nvm, let's not be hating. see you soon!( i miss you house )

...you could have chocolate-coated everything/anything. yeah, just an after-dinner thought.


spore is reallty too boring. need to get out. I CAN'T FRICKIN WAIT FOR SUMMER!

until then, i really need to find myself a job. preferrably one that i'll manage to stick with for over a week this time. *call colin TMR to ask  for an internship/ attachment/ if he wants free labour sometime next week. after, i should then find a job which actually pays. just for the fun of it. i was thinking something fun, like ben &jerry's or haagen daz at vivo seeing how it's so close. we'll see. haha either way, i should really get a job. in between shopping, swimming, tanning ( i try, but i don't actually tan because i know i'm stuck with this ghastly pale for the rest of my life) and sleeping, i've taken to watching the old-school xmen cartoon series... in anticipation of xmen origins (29th april!...don't judge.) anyway, i've only just realised how good cartoons are. i mean, the characters are hilarious! you never really get how funny their comments are when you were a kid. eg. wolverine is one witty bloke. biting sacarsm, cynicism and all that. he's a good laugh! see this is why i need a job.

archi test on next sunday.

( nrghnrgh )

anyway, 21st JUNE! COME AROUND NOW.

just did my nus apps. only because i'm too damn tired of talking to more friends, architect friends and other random aunties and uncles about course choices.  so its.. ARCHI!  HELLO COFFEE/ TEA/ VITAMINS/ 14 HOUR SLEEP WEEKENDS/ PAPERCUTS/ KEEPONWORKINGGGG-IPOD SONGS. and GOODBYE SUNLIGHT/ DAYLIGHT/  POSSIBLY EVEN MOONLIGHT/ SLEEP/ 4 DAY WEEKS/ SOCIAL-LIFE (OR WHAT'S LEFT OF IT) ok enough caps, too much drama.

well, technically i haven't sent in my apps.. since i can't pay the app fee (stupid site's down), so there's still a chance to change if i'd like. i just realised that archi is a 6 year long course if i do my masters overseas (which i  will want to if i make it past the coming 4 years) and that's as long as sarah's medicine course in oxford. so i can't laugh at how she'll come out old and greying anymore.

( to-dooo )

the past few days have been filled with talks, lunches, sit downs, pro/con lists and excessive napping.i have this weird thing when i sleep when i'm stressed. Probably called escapism,

archi/ fass/ law. ok ignore law for now, it's a really random thing i just threw in. so archi or fass.

they couldn't be more different. one of the most demanding/time-consuming vs possibly the most slack. i visited tessa today at the archi studio and oh my, it's like art nightmare but worse. the studio is huge... and incredibly messy. there's cups and food wrappers everywhere and i saw where they set up camp. it's like this little shack (and next to the dustbin! why next to the dustbin! that's just unhygienic.) but apparently the guys bring those foldable army beds. tessa says you don't sleep over like everyday- just maybe once every 2 weeks. fun.

( pro/con list draft 2 )

haha i haven't posted in ages! not entirely sure why i am doing so now... but anyway!

despite this being a supposedly-awesome- let your brains turn to mush- holiday period, i'm finding myself getting really restless. i reckon it might be due to my sleep at 5, wake up at 2 schedule. just a hunch. but i really want to get a job asap! like i need to feel useful dammit!

stupid job search is pointless. i can't get a job (that i want). if i really can't find a job by say, feb... i think i'll just ask if i could volunteer or intern without pay at either a museum/ archi/id firm or archi/id magazine. or alternatively, be a dog-walker. i'm serious! im suffering from major dog withdrawal syptoms! i would actually do it for free! plus its good exercise. i'm just scared that i might somehow (i don't know exactly how) lose or kill the dog. like if it gets hit by a car or something!

art friend! new brushes and a board to paint on! no excuses now! and when im done, i'll return for pastel supplies! how exciting! i miss art tremendously. yes, strangely enough, i really do. ohh! and i have to do my stupid port folio task for ucl! ah i forgot about that. ok erm, tmr... i'll start erm, thinking about it.

ok cant wait for june! ah ha hahaaa! a whole awesome month of travelling!!! not sure if i might make it through the coming 6 months though! i think i'd still need a holiday before june.

so need to get a job. been spending ridiculous amounts of money lately. well not really.... apart from the camera, just tons of clothes.

JUNE COME NOW! but skip the months of feb/march (whichever our results come out in).

back from hk! and i can finally say i've been to part of china! somewhat.

the trip was mostly good. time spent with the family, minus kor kor isaac. lots of shopping and lots of food as expected. sorta like a holiday in spore out of spore. just that everybody spoke cantonese and that i couldn't understand a thing. i felt really rude cos i just kept ignoring ppl. overly aggressive salespeople seem even scarier in a language so rapid and so incomprehensible. but anyway, now i can say thank you in two different ways in cantonese- an addition to my extensive vocabulary consisting of numbers 1 to 10. i can almost call myself a true cantonese and daddy would be so proud.

though i didn't exactly shop a whole lot, shopping was pretty fun.
-2 tops
-2 dresses
-2 pairs of shoes
-a bag
omg and almost!- my camera! this horrible camera man almost cheated me! i came so close to getting the 450d at a 25% discount but we got really paranoid when he took so long to find his stock. the idiot of a man even tried to make me take his display model. dude, are you slightly insane? so we cancelled the purchase and hurried out. so now it means i have to get the full-priced one... but i really rather be safe than sorry.

but on the whole, hk is quite a great city. crowded as it is, the ppl are generally nice and you can really tell they work hard and play hard too.

ergh ucas status hasn't changed in some time. 2 more to be decided... but the more i think about unis and where i want to go, overseas seems to become a less likely option. mainly because i'm realising how much i'll miss my family and friends and spore, and also how i don't want to burden my parents. as much as i tell myself how awesome and valuable an experience it'll be, i don't know if  spending so much money for me to be miserable over there will really be worth it. i just realllyyyy don't know now....

ew college board just reminded me to sign up for jan sats...

i wish i could do it all over again. retake all my papers... cos i know i didn't do great. haha no, i don't actually. it's too troublesome. but i can't help feeling that i kinda let myself down this exams... and it's not a ahh nevermindd la kinda feeling. so i will just have to occupy myself so that i don't dwell on it.

briefly went shopping today but wasn't really in the mood so i will continue tmr. haha i've made good my promise to myself- to start exercising after the 24th. i can't believe i've let myself grow so... soft. yuck. i'll take tmr's shopping as some intensive brisk walking or something and maybe run when i get back.

well it's in your hands now. and i know that whatever becomes of it, i should be alright with it. cos even though i want all the As, if you're fine with it, i'm fine with it. (or at least i will be eventually)

last night i had the strangest dream about being back in mg. it was so odd! but anyway when i woke up i felt immensely sad. and i'm missing mg alot alot now. sometimes i forget how good schooling can be.

i just realized that come monday, we'll all be done with jc forever and ever and ever. amen. and i don't exactly feel a tinge of sadness or nostalgia or anything. i think ac will always be a sort of blurry 2 transit years between secondary and uni for me. the only thing i'm particularly glad that i did was art because it was a very good new experience which i'm sure i will take with me after jc. haha i actually am missing practical art (who would have thought)- can't wait to raid art friend and get supplies so i can have my own fun! well whatever it is, i'm just glad jc's finally done.

In work and play for honors won,
today our hearts confess The debt we owe, the love we hold

 

2 days to art and erm... about 6 to lit, whichhh is the last paper. hahh

got to study hard for these 2 papers because i will kill myself if i screw up SOVA and hence compromise coursework which i almost died doing. and also because i quite messed up lit paper one already so i must make up for it during paper 4. eghh i think lit paper one was the paper which i was most upset over. it's lit! it was supposed to be good ):

then again, none of the papers have been great. i don't think the A levels have been great in general. which is really unfortunate. i feel like i kinda studied harder during other exams over the past 2 years then i have this time round. we really do have too many exams. everyone's feeling rather bleah and jaded.

andd i can't decide if i should do sats 2! i hate sats! stupid america and their stupid systems. i can't decide! i'll only have a week to study for it, plus i suck at sats, plus i'm not suppose to even be in singapore on the 6th, plus i'm going to be too damn lazy to study after the 24th! howhowhow? have to decide by tonight

on a happier note, i've been revising my post As to-do list. i take much pride in it and it's now rather comprehensive. (: makes me very happy and cheery thinking about it too. new to the agenda: visit kor kor isaac in montreal in june. montreal summer, plus trip to toronto and nyc (metropolitan museum of art!).

yay. now back to studying about installation of a room full of hairballs.
(i hate sats)

[edit] hahaha rach and i just realised late registration for dec sats only applies to u.s applicants. oh dear. oh well so no more decision-making for me. hurray! not particularly sad that i can't apply to some of the unis i was planning on applying to... well not upset just yet. no more pomona/wesleyan/amherst etc... oh well, i'll take it as god's way of closing doors. alrighty then, back to art.

oh yeah just got an email about ucl archi interviews. and apart from existing port folio they want us to make another 5 more drawings/paintings of themes like "your favourite place in your city", "the view from a window" and "a memory from an important event in your life" etc... haha very reminiscent of primary school compositions. that's great.